If you fail to plan, you are planning to fail!

So the last two days have been really rough! Yesterday was especially bad... I think that bad habits are really hard to stop. We headed over to Gilbert on Wednesday to take Ethan and his cousin Makenna for a walk in their strollers around the new mall. Well I didn't think to plan out my meals for the day or my activities so I ended up heading off to the mall w/o a good meal before we left. By the time I got there I was super hungry. We decided to eat at the food court and I was really tempted by a new Philly Cheese Steak place and the pizza place. I fought the urge though (largely in part to my wonderful wife who suggested that I not eat Pizza even though she really wanted some). Instead we got food from Panda Express. Although this provided me with he opportunity to eat healthier... I choose instead to split a meal with my Leann and justified the action of ordering non healthy food by the fact that we were splitting a meal. So I ordered half and half fried rice and chowmein... not a good choice. Next we ordered the entree... and I picked something with Chicken in it.... but as it turns out the potato chicken was not a good choice either.... it had mostly potato in it. Leann ordered the chicken and mushroom entree. On top of that we split a medium lemonade... that was loaded with sugar and was not "lite lemonade"!

So on with the day right.... well on our way back from shopping at the new mall the girls were getting really cranky and I suggested that we stop by Bahama Bucks (which is Tiffany's favorite) so that they would feel better after getting a little sugar in their system. Well when we get there Tiffany offers to buy me a strawberry smoothie... to which I just say yes without thinking. When she brings it to the car it's HUGE and topped with a ton of whip cream.... and at this point I feel bad not eating it since she bought it... so I down the whole thing...... bad decision again! On top of that when I get home I take a nap because I was up late with Ethan and got up early.... and probably because I was crashing from all the sugar I took in. Anywho... when I get up Tiffany offers me a Little Debbie Nutty Bar that she says she put in the freezer just for me (I know... Tiffany is the devil right!), well I resist at first but then I go into the freezer to get some chicken and I see it sitting there and I eat it... fully knowing the consequences of my actions! I tell you .... bad habits are hard to break. For dinner I was going to just have a protein shake because of all the bad eating throughout the day but then Leann offers to get me a bowl of the dinner that she and Cori made and I felt bad saying no (plus I was really hungry) so I said yes... well this dinner involved Chicken, lots of cheese, white rice, and pineapple. I am proud to say that I limited myself to only one bowl though! Once again I was provided with the opportunity to eat healthy and I just opted not to..... because it was easier, or I was weak, or some other excuse that I was able to justify my actions with! I think that is my biggest weakness and the biggest thing I need to overcome... my ability to justify my actions. The last thing that made yesterday a setback was right before I went to bed I was hungry again (probably because I only had one small bowl at dinner) so I opened up the closet and there waiting for me were some Little Debbie Swiss Cake rolls that Tiffany had bought... and bam, just like that I had one in my mouth. But I did feel guilty so I only ate one of them... until this morning when I woke up and the other one was just waiting for me there at the counter. That's when I ate Swiss Roll number two... which lead to my bad habits this morning. One of the big things that I struggle with is if I cheat once in particular day, or even week for that matter.... I end up justifying that as a good reason to continue to cheat the rest of the day (or, heaven forbid, week)... because "I've already blown today".

So today wasn't as bad. So far today I've eaten 1 Swiss cake roll, 3 protein bars, and a mini turkey meatloaf from the eating for life cook book..... oh, and 4 mini soft chips ahoy cookies.... that guess who left on the counter.

On top of all of this I blew my exercise routine as well:

• I didn't do my leg work out (though my legs were killing me from the previous day's squats
• I didn't do any crunches
• I didn't do any pushups.

Things that I did do well over the last two days:

1. Refused to get Pizza even when I was still hungry after Panda.
2. Took my vitamins.
3. Only ate one bowl of fattening food for dinner when I wanted two.
4. Blogged this stuff.
5. Documented my eating habits.

So what have I learned from all this and what will I do better tomorrow?

I'm not a very religious person... in the sense that I don't subscribe to any particular religion.... and frankly I'm not the biggest fan of organized religion but.... I am certainly a spiritual person and I do believe in a higher power.... or a connectedness amongst all things. Having said that (and that sounding way more deep that what I was planning on blogging tonight), this next thing I'm going to say is going to sound cheesy and silly... but... Last week I was watching Evan all-mighty with my family, which is admittedly a cheesy movie, and I was struck by some of the comments that "God" (played so well by Morgan Freeman) said:

"Let me ask you something. If someone prays for patience, you think God gives them patience? Or does he give them the opportunity to be patient? If he prayed for courage, does God give him courage, or does he give him opportunities to be courageous? If someone prayed for the family to be closer, do you think God zaps them with warm fuzzy feelings, or does he give them opportunities to love each other? "

I know it's silly because it's from a movie but I'm really moved by this quote. I whole heartily believe that it is true. I've had opportunities all my life to get in shape and get fit as well as opportunities to eat poorly and make poor choices... which I've done my fair share of when it comes to my health. Some times I made the right choices and I took advantages of those opportunities for a while... and I got in really good shape and I maintained it.... but lately I've been making poor choices. Actually for the last 10 years I've been consistently making those poor choices. Well starting tonight, starting this very instant I'm going to be making more of those opportunities, I'm going to be choosing more wisely and I want each and every one of you out there reading this to hold me accountable to that. Please, please do, it's going to help me a lot to know that you all are helping to keep me honest on this one.

Anywho, back to what this section was supposed to be about... the things that I've learned and hence going to do better tomorrow:

1. I'm going to work on not justifying things and stick to the plan.
2. I'm going to see my opportunities for what they are and take advantage of them.
3. I'm going to lay down some ground rules for next time Tiffany comes to town :)
4. I'm going to plan more!